Law roundup: Stranded vehicle threatens to become more than a lawn ornament

Someone allegedly crashed a 90s model Subaru Legacy into someone’s front lawn and began revving the engine, attempting to get it out. A neighbor purportedly recognized the vehicle from its normal habit of “driving crazy” and they were afraid the vehicle would go through their fence. A tow truck was called.

Someone reportedly pulled Christmas lights off of street signs and then walked down the middle of the street. Ten damaged strings and garland were reportedly recovered.

An ex-girlfriend allegedly had the key to a residence of someone she was caring for and broke into a safe where she stole $50,000.

A mini-drone and a lot of fly fishing gear was reportedly stolen out of someone’s vehicle.

Someone told the Kalispell Police Department that they almost hit a man allegedly standing in the middle of the road where he was screaming and flipping people off. The pedestrian told officers he was looking for his phone and didn’t mean to scare people.

A man was reportedly shoved to the ground while leaving a bar.

Someone complained about cars driving too fast down the road and parking illegally.

Officers were asked to check on a man’s welfare after he fell and seemed unable to get up. Officers did not find anyone matching the description of the man.

A resident saw a man on the front porch, standing on a table and trying to get into the house through the window. The man jumped off and walked toward the front door where he sat on the porch. The man was taken to the hospital for a mental health evaluation.

A man wrapped in a blanket was allegedly acting aggressively outside a building where young women were working.

A man reportedly wanted to speak to an officer regarding data he felt would be useful to law enforcement and offered himself as a resource for his interpretation on how homelessness is changing in the valley.

A woman reportedly heard someone bang on her sliding glass door three times.

A woman allegedly wanted to turn over the vehicle she rented, and its contents, to police. She believed it had been turned into a “rolling projector of sexual subjection” and may have been hallucinating there were cameras inside it. An officer suggested it would be best for her to return the car to the rental agency and let them handle the situation.

Security footage reportedly showed a male rolling up to a location on a bicycle that he propped up and walked away from. The bicycle, which still had a price tag on it, was collected by police for safekeeping.

Someone suspiciously parked in front of a building and walked around it, trying to open the doors.

A number of young people, who looked underage, were allegedly seen leaving a store “absolutely wasted,” and driving away in a vehicle with a plastic bag over the driver’s side window. While in the store, one woman in the group purportedly fell asleep in line.

A woman alleged her boyfriend threatened her with his fists, stole her phone out of her hands and took off in a car.

Apparently it’s not cool to talk to yourself and spin around in front of customer vehicles, which someone wanted officers to kick a man off a property for doing.