Few fans catching Finals fever

This week's top 10:

-10. Wake me when it's over. Game 5 of the NBA Finals is tonight, and unfortunately we are guaranteed at least a sixth in this dreadful series. Four games, four blowouts - now that's must-see TV, reflected in the near-record low ratings so far.

(This series is so fan-unfriendly that it's pulling in worse ratings than when the Finals were broadcast on tape delay late at night.)

I guess we could all hold out hope that both teams will play well in the same game and give us something interesting to watch. But for now, we'll just have to pose this question to the NBA conspiracy theorists out there: If the league is so adept at rigging things, why didn't they arrange a Miami-Phoenix Finals?

-9. Marketing genius. Today's NASCAR race is called the Batman Begins 400. At first, you kind of recoil in reflexive disgust at such crass marketing, but then you get to thinking and realize that it's no more or less crass than any of the other races out there - the Coca-Cola 600, Subway Fresh 500, etc.

Keeping a couple of races every summer open to be renamed after the latest blockbuster is just smart business.

-8. Every 53 years, like clockwork. The College World Series got underway Friday featuring the Oregon State Beavers, making their first appearance in Omaha since 1952.

The last time my alma mater made the CWS, it was known as Oregon State College, Harry Truman was still in the White House, the end of the Korean War was still more than a year away and "I Love Lucy" had just wrapped up its first season, though Red Skelton and Milton Berle ruled the airwaves.

And in their first game Saturday, the Beavers lost to top seed Tulane 3-1 after getting jobbed in the seventh inning on an interference no-call that eventually led to two runs. Not that I'm a bitter fanboy loser or anything.

-7. More good manners from the gentleman's game. Last weekend at the Booz Allen Classic (it's a golf tournament, not a drinking contest), Rory Sabatini violated several of golf's rules of etiquette when, frustrated by the slow play of his partner Ben Crane, he played out of turn, walked up to the 17th green even though Crane had not yet hit his approach, putted out before Crane marked his ball and basically acted like a jerk.

So bad was his behavior that the gallery on the 18th green actually booed Sabatini.

-6. You can go home again. Last week ESPN announced that prodigal son Keith Olbermann would return to the fold, co-hosting with former "SportsCenter" partner Dan Patrick for an hour each Friday on Patrick's radio show.

This is both good and surprising news, as there has never been a better "SportsCenter" pairing than those two, and the number of breakups worse than the falling out between Olbermann and ESPN in 1997 can probably be counted on one hand.

Olbermann has moved on, hosting an intelligent news program on MSNBC, and "SportsCenter" has devolved into a gimmick-laden shell of its former self. The reunion of Dan and Keith, if only for an hour a week, can only help raise the level of discourse on sports.

-5. This week's sign that the government isn't placing nearly enough children into protective custody. Week 3 of "Sports Kids Moms & Dads" offered up this choice bit of wisdom from dad Craig, while he is making his 8-year-old son Trenton run stairs as part of his training to become an NFL superstar: "If you vomit, you vomit."

Craig also gave us this lame rationalization so he can sleep at night reason for Trenton's rigorous schedule: "Find out what your 8-year-old loves, and that's his schedule."

I really have no idea what this guy is talking about most of the time.

Still, in the interest of fairness, Craig has shown so far that he is an ideal parent when it comes to attending games. He is positive and encouraging, which was in stark contrast to a loudmouth dad from the opposing team - who was heckling 8-year-olds!

Seriously, what is the point of allowing concealed weapons if no one is going to use them at the appropriate time?

-4. This Goosen is golden. Right before I left home yesterday to go to the office, Retief Goosen had just gone bogey, double-bogey to drop to even par, and I was sure that Pinehurst No. 2 was about to implode on the golfers still on the course.

By the time I arrived and turned on the tube, Goosen had responded with back-to-back birdies and finished up the third round with another to sit at 3-under.

That kind of rally is the stuff (repeat) champions are made of.

-3. Play nice, boys. Angels manager Mike Scioscia and Nationals skipper Frank Robinson got into it last week when Robinson asked umpires to inspect Brendan Donnelly's glove for a foreign substance. Pine tar was found, Donnelly was ejected, and Scioscia took issue with the entire incident and had some choice words for Robinson.

That didn't sit too well with Robinson, who fired back at Scioscia, causing both benches and bullpens to empty.

The whole thing was pretty comical, but you get the feeling that if Robinson was 10 years younger he would have put a Nolan Ryan-versus-Robin Ventura-like beat down on Scioscia.

-2. Testing the bottomless-ness of the abyss. Mike Tyson's sorry performance last Saturday drained even more out of the already shallow pool of boxing dignity. How anyone in their right mind would ever promote another Tyson fight is beyond me.

Which of course means we can expect another one early next year.

-1. Boom! Madden to NBC. John Madden signed a six-year deal with NBC to move to the Peacock when it starts broadcasting Sunday night NFL games in 2006, meaning Madden, currently on ABC's "Monday Night Football," will have worked for all four major networks.

It's a shame, too. I was hoping NBC would try something at least a little different with its telecasts, now it looks like it's just going to be more of the same. Might as well bring Pat Summerall out of moth balls to do play-by-play, too.

Andrew Hinkelman is a sports writer for The Daily Inter Lake. He can be reached at hink@dailyinterlake.com