Candy is dandy, but safety is sweeter

Although most women do appreciate flowers, candy or cards on Valentine's Day, what we need most is a safer world for ourselves and our daughters.

For more than two decades, the Family Violence Prevention Fund has worked to end violence against women and children around the world.

It's estimated that nearly one-third of American women report being either physically or sexually abused by a husband or boyfriend at some point in their lives. One in five teenage girls has been a victim of such abuse in a dating relationship. Yet, statistics show that only 3 percent of those abused actually seek help.

In 2002, the group launched its Coaching Boys into Men campaign to motivate men not only to set the right examples for young boys, but to teach them that violence has no place in a relationship. Log on to www.endabuse.org for more information about the fund's purpose and updates on public policy.

Here in the Flathead, the Violence Free Crisis Line is on the front line combating domestic violence. This year marks the crisis line's 30th anniversary. Its services have expanded to include victim-witness advocacy services in courts, programs for families victimized by homicide, and support groups and counseling for mothers and children in crisis.

Last year, 3,000 local residents needing help contacted the 24-hour crisis line. Of those, nearly 1,600 people called for counseling on a broad range of social issues such as mental illness, chemical dependency, runaways and elder abuse.

In conjunction with the crisis line, the Family Violence Prevention Council has formed in the valley, involving local civic leaders, coaches and teachers with the common goal of eliminating abuse crimes. Funds are being collected to launch a local media campaign, "Teach Early," which will be aimed at guiding young boys in developing healthy relationships.

PEACE is a prevention program primarily operated by 10th- to 12th-grade youths and presented to seventh- through ninth-graders. Trained student volunteers visit the schools and deliver presentations about healthy relationships and bullying to seventh-graders, and sexual harassment and date-rape prevention to the older students. More than 2,000 youths are educated each year through the program. Students also are trained in crisis intervention and volunteer on the crisis line on afternoons and weekends.

The Abbie Shelter, a safe home for women and children escaping abusive situations, has been a part of the crisis line's programs since 1994. In 2005, it sheltered 42 women and 36 children escaping abusive situations for a total of 1,539 nights; and provided services to 1,800 individuals locally, including 1,088 battered women.

Additionally, Janet Cahill, director of the crisis line for the past 19 years, points out that more than 2,711 hours were devoted last year alone by volunteers who simply listened to others share their stories.

Yet, to be able to love without fear, for many in our communities, still seems unattainable. To help break the cycle of violence, donate generously to the Violence Free Crisis Line, P.O. Box 1401, Kalispell, MT 59903. If you want to earmark your donations for the Teach Early program, just make a note on the memo lines on your checks.