Hearts and homes

Intern at Family Concepts in Kalispell helps state recruit, retain foster families

Being a foster parent is tough.

It's a 24/7 job. And it can be isolating for one or two grown-ups nurturing a child who need parents.

Consequently, Family Concepts - a private, nonprofit organization that deals with family-related matters - is trying to double the number of foster families in the Flathead and Tobacco valleys, and retain 80 percent of the foster families from one child to the next. Family Concepts has offices in Kalispell, Polson and Eureka.

A steering committee for the Sunburst Community Service Foundation - the umbrella organization for Family Concepts - wanted to bring in a full-time person to work on recruitment and retention, said Karen Dean, the foundation's director for Flathead, Lincoln and Sanders counties.

The organization sought a person through Volunteers in Service to America.

Family Concepts recently obtained a one-year intern from VISTA - Cameron McCoy, 22 - to bolster the state's efforts to recruit and keep foster families. McCoy recently graduated from Duke University with a biology degree, and is working for Family Concepts before he enters medical school.

Sixty active and inactive foster families are lined up from Flathead Lake to Eureka - handling about 160 foster children, which is a significant increase from roughly 100 youths a few years ago. Also, Family Concepts is trying to keep siblings together, and move children around as little as possible - meaning foster families need to be spread out geographically, Dean said.

"We need to double the number of foster families to meet the needs," McCoy said.

Family Concepts recently began some radio advertisements to recruit families. It conducts interviews to see whether someone is willing and able to become a foster parent, and it conducts training courses for prospective families.

Foster parents can range from young single people to grandparents.

"It's what's in their hearts and homes that matters," McCoy said.

Much of McCoy's job is to connect people with the right information, offices or people.

"I'm not quite the library. I'm the librarian," he said.

Dean said: "He pulls people together. He supports them. He empowers them."

McCoy is also supposed to tackle retention of foster families. He plans to set up exit surveys of foster families who are quitting to find out what needs to be addressed.

And because foster parents find their lives enveloped by their foster children, they often feel isolated, even from other foster families. Another McCoy goal is to build up communications among those families.

The Fosterparenting.com Web site lists questions for prospective foster parents to ask themselves:

. Can they love and care for a child who has come from a difficult background? That child could fear rejection, or may not love back a foster parent.

. Can they help a child develop a sense of belonging even though his or her stay will be temporary?

. Can they be firm and understanding in their discipline?

. Can they tolerate major failures and minor successes?

. Can they accept assistance and guidance from social workers?

. Can they maintain a positive attitude toward a foster child's parents, even if the parents helped cause the child's problems?

. Can they love a child and then let him or her go?

People interested in information about foster parenting can call McCoy at Family Concepts at 406-756-8721.