The gift of children

Travis and Rachel Steindorf of Kalispell delivered a divine gift to their cousins and best friends Ryan and Erin Reichman of Tacoma, Wash.

On Nov. 30, Rachel gave birth to the Reichmans’ fraternal twins, Adeline and Isaac, at Kalispell Regional Medical Center.

Though premature, the babies were born healthy, thanks to waiting until 33 weeks to meet their biological parents.

“It was pretty amazing to watch your own babies being born,” Erin said. “The doctors and nurses here have all been just wonderful.”

Via in vitro fertilization, she and Ryan created the two embryos that Rachel carried as a gestational surrogate.

Now at the end of their roller-coaster journey, first cousins Ryan and Travis and their wives Erin and Rachel remain awestruck at their accomplishment.

“There have been so many people praying for us,” Erin said.  “It’s an incredible gift from God.”

The arrival of Adeline and Isaac provides a joyful transition from the grief suffered after Ryan and Erin’s first child Aiden was stillborn at 27 weeks a few days after a rollover accident. Adding to the tragedy, Erin suffers from a severe heart condition that made her pregnancy dangerous and nearly intolerable.

Known as hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, the condition causes a thickening of the heart muscle that required Erin to have open heart surgery at 14 and have a pacemaker/defibrillator implanted at 19. 

During her pregnancy with Aiden, Erin received severe shocks as her pacemaker/defibrillator went off numerous times and she spent many days in the hospital.

“My body doesn’t handle estrogen,” she said. “It blocks my heart meds.”

After losing their first child, the couple decided to take a year off from discussing their aspirations for parenthood. Erin, an architect, and Ryan, a structural engineer, had busy careers to fill their time — but not the hole in their hearts.

When they returned to the issue, they agreed that another pregnancy was off the table. Erin wasn’t opposed to adoption but had watched a close friend have an adopted child taken back after a year.

“I couldn’t go through the loss of another child,” she said. “But I needed to be a mother. We went back and forth a lot.”

 At the same time, their cousins shared their heartbreak.

As parents of Jasper, 4, and Grace, 2, Travis and Rachel understood the longing of their cousins for children. They researched the idea of Rachel carrying a child for them and agreed they wanted to make the offer.

After a visit with Erin and Ryan in September 2008, Travis decided to write a letter with their amazing proposal.

“It was a good letter,” Ryan said. “It gave me an opportunity to sit and write and refine my thoughts. Like any tragedy, people have different ways of coping. For me I didn’t want to talk about it. If I didn’t talk about it, it went away.”

Finally during a 2008 Thanksgiving visit, all four of them talked and decided to pursue it. They went to Pacific Northwest Fertility & IVF Specialists in Seattle in January, where they were screened for diseases and other issues.

“We all had to have FDA approval,” Erin said with a laugh.

In March, the process began. Rachel and Erin received hormone protocols to synchronize their cycles so Erin would produce eggs for retrieval just as Rachel’s body was ready to accept and implant an embryo.

Almost immediately, Erin had heart problems from the huge doses of estrogen and ended up in the hospital. She wanted to quit, but persevered after copious prayer and soul-searching.

“The day of the retrieval I had to be discharged from the cardiac ward,” she said. “I had a cardiologist on hand to make sure nothing went funky.”

From nine eggs, four became embryos. The decision was made to implant two when Rachel arrived in early May.

“It was a little uncomfortable, but it wasn’t painful,” she said.

Travis said he knew right away that his wife was pregnant because she developed “pregnancy brain” where she repeated herself. Going against instructions not to check early, Rachel and Travis confirmed the diagnosis with a home kit.

It was Mother’s Day when they shared the news with Ryan and Erin via a picture of the positive pregnancy test.

“It was scary and exciting,” Erin said.

A subsequent blood test confirmed the home diagnosis and indicated even more exciting results — multiple babies. All four attended the first ultrasound at Northwest Women’s Health Care where, much to Rachel’s relief, she had just two babies from the two embryos.

At subsequent imaging, Ryan and Erin found out they were expecting a girl and a boy.

“There was kind a kind of completeness to it,” Ryan said with a smile. “This was a chance to have a complete family.”

Things continued like a fairy tale through the end of September when Dr. Mirna Bowden noted disturbing changes in Rachel’s cervix. She went on bed rest for the first week of October, then entered North Valley Hospital for observation.

“It had been a really good pregnancy until then,” Rachel said.

In the second week of October, she flew to Seattle in case the babies were born very prematurely. It was the low mark for Rachel, who feared all their efforts might end with sick infants condemned to months in the hospital.

But all went well and she returned home at 30 weeks to her own children and husband. It was the crucial point where Kalispell Regional Medical Center could provide neonatal care.

 Rachel, Travis, Erin and Ryan had much to celebrate when they gathered for Thanksgiving in Kalispell. She had made 32 weeks, a critical point where infants have sufficient development for health.

Rachel was fine when Ryan left Sunday night to go back to his job while Erin stayed in Kalispell.

“I got to Tacoma and went to bed then I got a call at 3:40 a.m.,” he said. “I got up and drove back.”

Rachel was in labor.

Travis stayed home with the children as Erin and she headed for Kalispell Regional Medical Center. Rachel received drugs to stop labor but the Reichman twins were determined to emerge on Nov. 30.

“At 8:15, I delivered in the O.R.,” Rachel said.

She said 14 people were in the room, including Bowden, obstetrician/gynecologist Dr. Perry Birky, neonatalogist Dr. Judy Rigby and specialist nurses.

Adeline entered the world first, screaming and kicking, at 4 pounds 12 ounces. About 29 minutes later, Isaac joined his sister at 4 pounds 5 ounces. Both looked good and earned high scores on the rating system for premature babies.

Ryan learned by cell phone that his new son and daughter had arrived.

“I was in Moses Lake,” he said.

About 7 1/2 hours later, Ryan arrived to share the joy of the births in person. Rachel remembers breaking down when Erin was holding a baby and Ryan walked in and looked down at their divine gift, given a few weeks before Christmas.

“For me, that was the moment that made it all worthwhile,” she said.

Rachel was home with her own children by 8 o’clock that night, feeling slightly surreal. She said she didn’t have a problem separating herself from the babies. She jokes with Erin that she has a “no return policy.”

Travis, who works as an appraiser, admits that the ups and downs and separations were hard on both of them and their own children. If they had it to do over, neither he nor Rachel would change a thing.

“It’s nine months for us for a lifetime for them,” Travis said.

“They’re going to make great parents.”

Reporter Candace Chase may be reached at 758-4436 or by e-mail at cchase@dailyinterlake.com.