From China ... with love

Today is Valentine’s Day. It is also Chinese New Year.

That’s certainly a rare occurrence — an optimal convergence of love and good fortune that last happened in 1953 — but for me it is even a more special day.

You see, it is also my second wedding anniversary.

I got married two years ago on Chinese New Year to a woman who traveled 6,000 miles from her native China just to marry me. They say Chinese New Year is lucky, and if my wedding is any indication, you can count me in.

When you consider that the world population is approaching 7 billion people, what is the chance of finding your soulmate from half a world away? Start with the fact that if we had been born even a few years earlier, there would not have been any way to meet on the Internet at all because there would not have been an Internet yet. Then think of all the cultural barriers, the logic barriers, and the money barriers that would have to be crossed before a meeting of the minds could take place, let along a lifelong commitment. It’s truly mind-boggling.

But it all fell into place as if God had a special plan for us — step by step, piece by piece — until two years ago, just a month after she had arrived in America for the first time, we began our journey together as a married couple on Chinese New Year.

We were married on Feb. 7 of that year, but Yuzhao and I decided to celebrate our anniversary on each succeeding Chinese New Year, whatever date that happened to be. It’s a way to honor her native custom and also to remind ourselves that our marriage is a blending of two worlds.

Of course, it’s not easy for any two individuals to come together in marriage and try to create a new family that takes account of both the wife’s and husband’s different backgrounds and family histories. But when the wife comes from China and the husband comes from Montana, there is an even bigger bridge to build.

You can bet there have been lots of tears and lots of misunderstandings, but there is also the underlying love that we first discovered when we wrote e-mails to each other in a crazy act of blind faith. In some ways, the date of our first e-mail meeting is our real anniversary because that was the spark of recognition that led us to commit our lives to each other.

But Chinese New Year, or Spring Festival as it is known in China, provides a real opportunity for us to look forward as well as backward with each year that passes on our journey together.

There are many traditions associated with Spring Festival, which is the most important holiday in China, but one of the most important traditions is something that could help any marriage, and indeed any life.

That is the sweeping away of the bad luck of the previous year, literally using a broom to give the home a thorough cleaning prior to the New Year. Then on the holiday, the brooms are put away to ensure that the new good luck won’t be accidentally swept away.

Like all traditions, it is just a symbol of what our heart hopes for — and in this case, it symbolizes the way forward for any married couple: Put the past behind and always look to the future.

It’s a good lesson for all of us on this combined Valentine’s Day and Chinese New Year, but especially for me. I usually have plenty to worry about in this column, but if I take a respite from tilting at political windmills for one week, I hope I can be forgiven.

I just wanted to say, “I love you,” to the one woman who means everything to me, and to remind her that we have a date in 2048, the next year when Valentine’s Day and the Spring Festival will be held on the same day. That will be our 40th anniversary — and believe me, if I am still alive and married to my wonderful wife, I will be a very happy old man.

So, happy anniversary, dear — now and in the future.

n Frank Miele is managing editor of the Daily Inter Lake and writes a weekly column. E-mail responses may be sent to edit@dailyinterlake.com