'Playing Monopoly with God' show comes to Whitefish

Every new parent worries about their first-born child. But Melissa Bangs’ first weeks of motherhood landed her in a psych ward.

At first, Bangs thought she was just anxious.

She followed the baby books. She nursed her daughter, Adelaide, every two hours. Every few minutes, Bangs checked to make sure Adelaide was breathing. When Adelaide moved her toes, Bangs analyzed why. When Adelaide slept, Bangs stayed awake — for a month.

“I couldn’t understand what was wrong. I gave birth at home and it was a beautiful experience shared with my husband and midwife,” she said. “I mean, it hurt like hell, but was as good as you could ask for.”

At 40 years old, Bangs was experiencing postpartum psychosis mania, a mood disorder that impacts an estimated 0.1 to 0.2 percent of moms.

The disorder, masked in anxiety, turned Bangs’ life into fear and distrust. Then it was replaced by a stage she called bliss, a loss of reality.

To Bangs, time disappeared. She believed she could see ancient truths, could see love and life radiating from inanimate objects. And everything was turning into light — herself, her daughter, her kitchen table.

Adelaide was born in September of 2012. Roughly 30 days later, Bangs entered a psychiatric hospital in a mystic realm.

“With a four-week-old baby, this was the most needed I had ever been, but had no way of being there,” she said.

She was suddenly a patient and her husband was alone with a newborn.

Roughly three years later, what was Bangs’ hell became her best performance. On March 12, Bangs, a Missoula-born comedian, will tell her story on stage at O’Shaughnessy Theater in Whitefish.

Bangs said her performance, “Playing Monopoly with God and Other True Stories,” uses comedy to talk about an uncomfortable disorder.

“As a culture, we are hungry for true stories as an antidote to the isolation our culture can bring,” she said. “I share my story on stage to talk about a mental health issue that is largely avoided.”

While only a small percent of moms experience postpartum psychosis, a reported 15 to 20 percent experience a postpartum mood disorder such as postpartum depression, anxiety or post-traumatic stress, according to Postpartum Support International.

Bangs said like most mothers, she didn’t want to tell anyone when she started to feel overwhelmed by being a mom.

“As a Montanan, there’s this stigma that we have to be okay and mental health is shoved under a rug,” Bangs said. “My experience was just so abnormal, it couldn’t be hidden. During my time in the hospital, I considered never telling where I had gone and why. But that’s not really my thing.”

After being hospitalized, Bangs was diagnosed as bipolar and was prescribed lithium to prevent future manic episodes.

While she no longer believed the world was turning into light and she recognized her family, she still didn’t feel emotionally attached to anything — even her daughter.

With the help of a psychiatrist and naturopathic physician, Bangs began to investigate the weeks where she lost herself leading to her numbness. Together, they discovered she had a hormone imbalance and discovered her postpartum disorder.

Within Bangs’ 100-page hospital record, page 87 includes a scribbled nurse’s note: “Patient says she will do comedy on this experience.”

“I don’t even remember saying that,” Bangs said. “But I guess I was right about something in that horrible time.”

Bangs had studied comedy, but she put performing on hold as she built a consulting company.

“After finally understanding what had happened with my body after giving birth, I started talking with other moms and heard extraordinary and painful postpartum tales,” she said. “Too many stories included elements of shame.”

Bangs started telling her story in private. Then it grew to mom support groups, traveling to postpartum conferences, and radio talk shows.

The more she talked about what had happened and why, she realized her story had the best components of a comedy sketch — uncomfortable truths that needed to be pulled out of the dark and bizarre anecdotes.

Since she began performing in February 2015, Bangs has toured the state trying to pry open conversations about mental health. Whitefish is her last stop in Montana before she begins a nine-city West Coast tour.

“I’m sharing my story because it is so extreme,” Bangs said. “The disorder is vastly shared, and in tucking it away, a lot of mamas and papas and kiddos suffer.”

Tickets for Bangs’ March 12 O’Shaughnessy performance are on sale online at www.playingmonopolywithgod.com. For more information, visit the website or call 406-241-3500.

Reporter Katheryn Houghton may be reached at 758-4436 or by email at khoughton@dailyinterlake.com.