Lest ye be judged, all you football fans

| February 20, 2022 12:00 AM

While many might argue that watching football, not baseball, is actually America’s favorite pastime, it’s only recently that I’ve truthfully started to enjoy it, an admission football fans may consider sacrilege.

While watching the entire Super Bowl XVI game between the Rams and the Bengals last Sunday, and after the announcer stated that the first Superbowl was played in 1967, Jim concluded that “we” had therefore watched every Superbowl there ever was … to which I calmly replied, “Well, I haven’t.”

That news caught him off guard. I explained that, while it was possible my father had, it wasn’t like it was a big family thing to gather and watch Super Bowls every year. Maybe that puts my family in a minority nationally; I’m not sure. But football was never a big interest of mine as a kid even though my brother played in school.

It would be years — I would be an adult — before I truly understood what a “down” was, until a friend put it to me this way: “Each team basically has four chances to make a touchdown, and every time they move the ball at least 10 yards down the field they get to start over with four more chances, or ‘downs’ to go 10 more yards.”

That’s alI it took. I finally understood the basic premise of the game.

Growing up, my dad taught me how to play softball and tennis and those were the ball sports I loved. I played recreational softball from age 7 until I was in college when I played the much-loved roving shortfield position on the local Howard’s Club H bar team (I still have my team T-shirt — with original artwork by the same artist who painted Howard’s wall mural — featuring a seedy-looking guy in a bowler hat flirting at the bar with a disinterested blond.) I have a caricature of myself from a 1969 family vacation with me stopping a runner with one foot on her head and the other on second base, ball in glove, and me saying “Ho-Hum — Just another unassisted double play …” — That, thanks to my dad regaling the artist with the details from my last game.

In my 30s I played on a corporate team in Kalispell for a season, and in a ‘’snowball” tournament at the Conrad Complex. If I remember correctly, my hamstring seized up on my first chase after the ball in the snow.

In truth, until recent years watching an entire game of football on TV was almost impossible for me. I just didn’t grasp much of what was happening on the field and couldn’t keep up with the action. My eyes would glaze, my attention wander.

But as I’ve watched more TV football I’ve become more familiar with the strategies of gameplay and now I actually have a good time. Who knew understanding the game would have such a dramatic effect on my enjoyment of it? It’s like seafood or cilantro for some people; once you acquire a taste for it, you like it the rest of your life.

I can honestly say I was truly entertained by this season’s two playoff games. The Bengals/Chiefs game was the best football game I’ve ever seen — although I’m way behind in airtime of practically everybody in that regard.

However, while I’m happy I’ve acquired an eye and ear for football, I don’t think I’ll be parking myself on the couch for every Thursday, Sunday and Monday night football next season — that’s just not in my playbook.

Community editor Carol Marino may be reached at 406-758-4440 or community@dailyinterlake.com.