Law roundup: Man entranced by messages

Kalispell Police Department responded to a report of a man who was allegedly sitting in a parked vehicle, slumped over. An employee told officers the man was unresponsive after they banged on the window. Turns out, the mesmerized man, who was OK, was absorbed in texting.

A man holding a beer yelled as he reportedly got into a vehicle. He possibly shared a toast with his wife who was sitting in the passenger seat with a beer in her hand.

An object reportedly fell off a bridge, hitting the windshield of a vehicle, cracking it, and splashing water everywhere. The vehicle owner believed the object was intentionally thrown off the bridge.

A curmudgeonly neighbor with a golf club allegedly reported a puppy on the loose but would not speak to the dog owner about it. The dog owner told officers the German shepherd pup got out when his kids left a gate open playing hide-and-seek and said, “He would not take it well if someone hits his dog with a club.”

A “crotch rocket” rider’s zebra-print hoodie did no service in camouflaging their reckless driving when they reportedly sped through a stop sign. Their motorcycle was also missing a license plate.

A neighbor waltzed into a woman’s apartment allegedly looking for a friend. They left when asked, but she was advised to lock her doors and call if the neighbor returned.

A man wearing a black mask, blue coat, black shoes and pants was reportedly trying to steal a white Honda Civic with a lockpick and left, leaving a vehicle door open.

A man allegedly stabbed himself in the leg and passed out in a park pavilion where people gathered around as pressure was applied to the wound.

A pastor wanted officers to check on the welfare of a man with writing in red marker on his hands, who was babbling and posturing and then move him along. Another man on site was trying to calm him down while the police were called. The pastor said there was no point in banning him from being on the property because “they always come back anyway.”

Someone in a bright blue PT Cruiser allegedly stole a tip jar possibly containing around $50 from a business’s drive-thru window. A woman was ticketed and released.

“Strange trucks” were reportedly pulling up to a neighbor’s house and people were running around the lawn making noise.